“I will say yes to every favor, request, suggestion and invitation. I will swear to say yes where once I would say no.” – Danny Wallace

“No!” is a wonderful word.

It’s powerful, it’s universally understood, and it stops everything in its tracks. By saying no, you’re instantly slamming the door and holding it shut, ensuring nothing else gets through.

But how many of us say “No!” way too often?

You see, “No” really holds us back in life. It closes us off to many of life’s wonderful experiences, and causes us to resist what happens around us.

When we say no, we’re swimming against the current. When we say yes, we’re swimming with the current.

Which do you think is easiest? Which produces less stress? Which is faster, and more enjoyable?

We say “NO!” to life’s funny randomness, when a passing bus splashes rainwater all over our new jeans. We shout “NO!” to our emotions, resisting and fighting grief, when our pet rat passes away. We yell “NO!” when we don’t get that promotion, which we’d been working so hard to achieve.

Long story short: we say NO to everything, too often.

We fight against what happens to us in life, rather than allowing it to be as it is. We resist it, rather than accepting it. We say “No!” rather than saying “Yes” – or even just “Okay.”

By saying “Yes!” more to life, we go with the flow. Things become more enjoyable and positive, less stressful and anxious, and often the situation turns out for the better regardless.

So, SAY YES MORE.

And what about saying “Yes!” more socially too? Say “Yes!” when you’re invited to that party. Say “Yes!” when you’re asked if you’d like lunch with the boys. Say “Yes!” when you’ve asked to go on that speed dating night, which you wouldn’t normally even consider.

(That’s what Danny Wallace did in his great comedy cum self-help book, Yes Man. He said yes more. It changed his life.)

So, if you’d like to flow more with the current of life… If you’d like to inject a little more excitement into your day… If you’d like to enjoy the random twist and turns of fate…

Then SAY YES MORE.

The Australians call it a “bias for yes.” The Spanish say “Si a todo.” Buddhists describe it as flowing with the river of life. In this book, we simply say yes more.

Try it out, even if just for a week. It’ll change your world.

Say yes more – and you will be happy.

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“If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.” – Meister Eckhardt

We live in a fast-paced, microwave, drive-thru, Buy-It-Now society.

It’s a society that has forgotten to be truly grateful for the things around it. We only tend to be grateful for things when we no longer have them.

Think of the sense of relief you gain when you just get over an illness, and are so thankful that your turbulent tummy has now settled. Consider how appreciative you are when those tests come back clear. Or when the speeding camera doesn’t flash. Or when you finally find your lost child in the supermarket.

These are the moments in life when we realize how blessed we truly are.

Yet how many of us truly appreciate that on a day-to-day basis?

My guess is very few of us. We only become grateful of things when we think we don’t have them.

But here’s the thing: by counting our blessings every day, in a very literal way, we become happier people. Research across the globe in countless studies has proven this over and over again.

So, when was the last time YOU were truly grateful?

Think of all the wonderful things you have to be grateful for right now. It could be your family. Or your health. Maybe your home. Your friends. Your brain. Your heart. Your spirit. Even your DVD collection.

We’ve all got amazing things in our own lives that make us smile with joy. Things that bring a secret, loving tear to our eyes.

And if we can only learn to count these blessings every day, we’ll discover a true happiness and greater appreciation of the beautiful world we surround ourselves with.

So, if you can, make that part of your daily ritual. Count your blessings, briefly in the morning, and briefly at night. Then smile at the world for sending such great things your way.

Be grateful – and you will be happy.

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“Not very long,” answered the Mexican.

“But then, why didn’t you stay out longer and catch more?” asked the American.

The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family.
The American asked, “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”

“I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs. I have a full life.”

The American interrupted, “I have an MBA from Harvard and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat.”

“And after that?” asked the Mexican.

“With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or even New York City! From there you can direct your huge new enterprise.”

“How long would that take?” asked the Mexican.

“Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years,” replied the American.

“And after that?”

“Afterwards? Well my friend, that’s when it gets really interesting, ” answered the American, laughing. “When your business gets really big, you can start buying and selling stocks and make millions!”

“Millions? Really? And after that?” asked the Mexican.

“After that you’ll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends.”

And the moral of this story is: ……… Know where you’re going in life… you may already be there.

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The momentum of conventional living carried Mildred into marriage just as America fell into the Great Depression of the 1930s. Her husband had trouble finding work, and later, due to differences in fundamental values, their paths eventually diverged and the marriage ended. In this time of crisis, Mildred began to question her entire existence and its meaning. It was a turning point and time of preparation for her life to come.

The seeds of her future were beginning to sprout; out of her inner search came new directions along the mountain paths she would hike — the solitude in the midst of nature’s companionship brought clarity, as she prepared for something she couldn’t yet name. In one six-month period, Mildred ended up hiking the entire length of the 2,050-mile Appalachian Trail — the first woman to do so.

Near the end of that journey came a revelation that was to shape the rest of her life. In her journal she wrote:
At the age of thirty, out of desperation, and a deep longing for a more meaningful way of life, while walking alone in the woods one night, I came to a moonlit glade and prayed. In that mo-ment, I felt a complete willingness, without any reservations, to give my life — to dedicate my life — to service. “Please use me!” I prayed to God. A great peace came over me.

By morning’s light, her old life was finished. But Mildred Norman’s preparation had only begun.
Nothing in her early years had foreshadowed this transformation. Many family members, friends, and neighbors, dismayed by the changes in Mildred, dropped out of her life. What followed was fifteen years of testing — a war between what she called her “lower, self-centered nature and her higher, God-centered nature.”

Struggling to integrate the spiritual awakening that came to her that night on her Appalachian journey, Mildred spent more and more time serving — working with senior citizens and the emotionally disturbed, and volunteering for various peace organizations. During this time, she slowly rid herself of unnecessary possessions, attachments, and useless activities. A pacifist and early advocate of voluntary simplicity, she pared her life to the bone. She now owned only two dresses — the second to wear while the other was in the wash. Mildred’s years of preparation culminated one morning in a second illumination, on her daily silent walk in nature:

All of a sudden I felt more uplifted than ever before — I knew timelessness, spacelessness, and lightness — I did not seem to be walking on the earth. Every bush, every tree seemed to wear a halo….There was a light emanation around everything, and flecks of gold fell like slanted rain through the air. The most important part was not the phenomena…it was the realization of the unity of all creation.

With this realization, the preparatory phase of Mildred’s life ended, and a new life began. She changed her name to Peace Pilgrim and resolved to walk across the length and breadth of North America, speaking of peace among nations, of peace between individuals, and of the all-important inner peace. Her life became a pilgrimage.

In the years that followed, Peace Pilgrim divested herself of all possessions except for the clothes on her back — she kept no coat, no sleeping bag, no money — only plain, rubber-soled shoes, long pants, and a simple tunic. In her pockets she carried her only earthly belongings: a folding toothbrush, a comb, a map of the area where she was walking, and her current mail.

She wore the tunic over a long-sleeved shirt in winter, and short sleeves in the summer. On the back of her tunic, Peace Pilgrim had printed the words, “10,000 miles for Peace.” Later it changed to “25,000 miles” — a number she far surpassed in her twenty-eight year pilgrimage, in which she crossed each Canadian province once and the entire United States nearly seven times.

As a pilgrim, Peace, as she was called, relied on the goodness and generosity of others, and on the grace of God. She never asked for food or lodging, but ate only what others offered freely. She took her rest in country fields, parks, bus stations, and homes across North America. Everywhere she walked she spoke of peace, inspiring her listeners to consider their highest ideals, and to begin or to continue living them.

Peace walked south in winter and north in summer; she had her share of sweltering days, frozen nights, and mortal dangers. But her faith in divine providence sustained her. When a hulking, half-crazed teenage boy attacked her, she made no effort to defend herself. She showed him only love and compassion, and was soon reassuring this lost young man that there was a way for him to find inner peace. Eventually he did.

Another time a man invited her into his car, they talked a while, and he invited her to get some sleep. She curled up trustingly and did just that. When she awoke several hours later, he confessed to her that he’d planned to rape her, but her trust rendered him unable to go through with it.

Once she faced down another disturbed man attempting to assault an eight-year-old girl. Peace stood her ground, gazing at him without anger or criticism, until he finally turned and left. Peace often said, “There is a spark of good in everyone, no matter how deeply it may be buried. It is the real you.” It was this divine spark that she addressed in every person she met.

Once, on an isolated road, Peace was caught by a sudden snowstorm — a blizzard so dense and fierce that she could not even see her hand in front of her face. Close to freezing, she surrendered to God’s will and stumbled on. Soon she found the railing of a bridge. Groping her way down the snowy embankment, she crawled underneath the bridge and found a cardboard box filled with wrapping paper. She curled up inside it, and went to sleep.

Peace woke to a blue sky and sparkling sun. Another day had begun. “Aren’t people good!” she loved to say. And everywhere she went, people proved her right, opening their hearts and their hearths to her. In this way, for nearly three decades, Peace Pilgrim lived as a spiritual servant in the world, touching and inspiring thousands on her journey for peace. Today, she is known by millions worldwide for her simple yet profound message: “This is the way of peace: Overcome evil with good, falsehood with truth, and hatred with love. Live according to your highest light, and more light shall be given.”

After Therese Neumann, Padre Pio is perhaps the most widely observed modern Western mystic to demonstrate divine powers of healing and regeneration. The first signs of his extraordinary qualities occurred unexpectedly on September 20, 1918. Then a thirty-one-year-old Capuchin monk, Padre Pio was sitting alone in the monastery chapel, praying after Mass. Outside, Padre Leone heard a scream within the chapel and ran in to find Padre Pio lying unconscious on the floor, bleeding profusely from the five wounds of the stigmata.

Several monks carried Padre Pio to his room, where he begged them to keep his condition a secret. But word spread. The church quickly put a ban of silence on him, concerned that this untested monk might be manifesting symptoms of hysteria. He was forbidden to write or speak in public — yet over the next five decades, Padre would prove to be one of the most remarkable Western saints in history.

Like Therese Neumann, Padre Pio bore for his entire life wounds of the stigmata that never healed. And thousands of individuals — from ordinary Italian peasants and fellow clerics, to high public officials and pilgrims from around the world — witnessed and testified to his powers of telepathy, prophecy, bilocation, levitation, and healing.

Although Padre Pio never left the city of San Giovanni Ro-tondo in his last fifty years, he often appeared to those in need far from his physical body — to teach, admonish, comfort, and heal. Numerous testimonies, by telegram, letter, telephone transcript, and personal declaration, document Padre Pio’s long-distance appearances in places he never physically visited — throughout Italy, Austria, Uruguay, and even Milwaukee, Wisconsin, where Padre Pio admitted appearing on June 25, 1950, to attend the death of a fellow monk’s father. When asked about his ability to appear in two places, Padre Pio replied, “If Christ multiplied the loaves and fishes, why cannot he multiply me?”

And the fragrance of violets that often emanated from Padre Pio also often manifested to those who prayed to him, and was noticed by witnesses in those places where he had miraculously appeared.

Padre Pio’s miraculous healing powers were well documented. He cured many illnesses deemed incurable, and on more than one occasion restored sight to the blind. His most well-documented case of healing involved a little blind girl named Gemma Di Giorgi, from Ribera, Sicily, who had been born with no pupils in her eyes. In 1947 her grandmother brought her on a long journey to see Padre Pio. Gemma’s grandmother, ardently devoted to Padre Pio, believed the saint could give sight to her granddaughter, even though her doctors declared it physically impossible for a human being to ever see without pupils.

That morning, Gemma and her grandmother arrived in Padre Pio’s village to wait in the enormous crowds that always attended Padre Pio’s Mass. Afterward, in the silence following Mass, all present heard a voice shout, “Gemma, come here!” Gemma’s grandmother led her through the crowd up to Padre Pio, where they both knelt at his feet. Padre Pio, after hearing Gemma’s confession, sweetly administered her first Communion, then gently stroked her eyes. Before they left, Padre Pio bid them farewell, saying, “May the Madonna bless you, Gemma. Be a good girl.”

At that very moment, before the crowd of witnesses, Gemma uttered a shriek as the power of sight was given to her for the first time — a miracle that would last for the rest of her long life. Numerous doctors who examined Gemma later admitted their bewilderment. By all known science, she should not have been able to see without the apparatus required for sight.

The testimonies of miraculous cures and demonstrations of Padre Pio’s supernatural abilities fill volumes. And the volumes written about this great contemporary saint are increasing each year.
Padre Pio left his body in 1968. More than one hundred thousand people came from around the world to attend his funeral in San Giovanni Rotondo, Italy, and half a million devotees would gather in Rome in 2002 to witness Pope John Paul II proclaim Padre Pio Saint Pio of Pietrelcina.

Many thousands wept at the passing of this humble saint, for the awe with which he was regarded for his miraculous powers was less than the love that his kindness had awakened in the hearts of his people.

Bios for Dan Millman and Doug Childers:
Dan Millman is a former world trampoline champion, hall of fame gymnast, university coach, college professor, and bestselling author whose eight books, including Way of the Peaceful Warrior, The Laws of Spirit, and The Life You Were Born to Live, have inspired millions of people in more than twenty languages. His books and seminars have influenced people from all walks of life, including leaders in the fields of health, business, education, entertainment, and sports. A youthful grandfather, he lives with his family in northern California.

Doug Childers is an author, editor, and writing coach whose books include The Energy Prescription and The White-Haired Girl. He lives with his family in northern California.

From the book Bridge Between Worlds. Copyright © 1999, 2009 by Dan Millman and Doug Childers. Reprinted with permission from New World Library. www.NewWorldLibrary.com

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Born Byron Kathleen Reid in Breckenridge, Texas, in 1942, she was raised in the small desert town of Needles, California, in the years following World War II. Her mother said that she was named Byron for money, after a wealthy relative offered financial support if the child was given his name, and Kathleen for love. Growing up, everyone called her Katie.

Her homemaker mother and her father, a railroad worker, saw Katie grow from a quiet, thoughtful little girl into an aggressive, competitive teenager who sought to be the best in everything she did. A top student, she played piano and sang in a regional choir. Beautiful, energetic, and fun, Katie was voted first runner-up for queen of her high school prom.

At nineteen she married Robert, her high school sweetheart. They moved to Fresno; two sons and a daughter soon followed. Robert and Katie formed their own company as equal partners. When her marriage, like many, met with difficulties, Katie, a perfectionist and high achiever, suffered the belief that she was not enough. She began striving for the usual symbols of happiness and security — money, beauty, talent, and success.

Katie invested their mutual earnings in real estate. Within a few years, she and Robert owned shares of numerous buildings in Needles’s business district. They bought a grand riverfront house and threw lavish parties attended by an elite and influential local crowd. By the 1970s, Katie had become a millionaire.

Katie now had her long-sought success. She was doing big business, raising a family, living high. But it wasn’t enough; nothing pleased or satisfied her. In her increasingly frustrated and ultimately futile search for happiness through money and power, Katie had “bullied, intimidated, and badgered” anyone, even her husband and children, to get her way.

But in the midst of having everything and seeking more, her passion had turned to desperation. Her marriage with Robert became a battle of wills, her family life a series of skirmishes. They were all casualties, especially the children. “If I didn’t get my way,” Byron Katie said, “I would leave the house and take the children with me.”

The third time she did this, Robert got involved with another woman. This was a time of darkness for Katie and for her children, but the seeds had been sown long before. For years she had held back the darkness and emptiness with food, alcohol, tobacco, and constant striving. But her strategy took its toll; her progressive disintegration led to rages, alcohol abuse, and paranoia. At one point she bought a gun and kept it loaded under her bed. Finally, even her children feared her. When her marriage ended in 1976, Katie and the children wound up penniless in Barstow, California.

Then, in 1979, she married Paul, an old friend fifteen years her senior. When Paul was nineteen and Katie four, he had paved the street where she lived. She still recalled being captivated by his laughter; she had loved him even then. Katie and Paul began buying, fixing up, and reselling old houses and were soon quite wealthy — Katie still had the knack. Once again she had money, friends, a thriving career, and a family she loved. But the meaning had drained out of her existence. She felt herself dying inside.

Paul, a good man, had married Katie on her way down. He’d seen a couple of friends have nervous breakdowns. But he’d never witnessed anything like his wife’s terrifying descent. Katie had once taken on the world, charmed people, closed deals, made money. Now, afraid to leave the house, she went weeks without bathing, changing her clothes, or brushing her teeth.

She spent days in bed — drinking, smoking, raging, popping codeine, eating ice cream by the gallon. Her weight shot up to over two hundred pounds. Her torment and her rage were unrelieved: “Nothing felt good, nothing made me happy, nothing brought me peace. In the end I was obese and starving….I was in so much pain and the pills weren’t working. I was insane, a dead woman still breathing.”

Her children spun off in their own mad directions, fleeing their cyclone mother raging on her bed. Paul became Katie’s primary caretaker — her buffer to a world she now feared. During the first seven years of their marriage, Paul suffered four heart attacks; the strain of caring for his wife came close to killing him. Katie spent the last two of those years lying on the bed, her unchanged clothing often plastered to her body and her unwashed hair matted to her head.

In 1986, after his fourth heart attack, Paul took Katie, now forty-three, to a halfway house. She lived in the attic, sleeping on the floor. All she wanted was to die. Then one morning Byron Katie woke up reborn.

The bare facts of this event cannot begin to convey its impact or explain its occurrence. Morning dawned, and Katie stirred, lying on the floor. She opened her eyes and saw a cockroach crawling across a human foot. She did not, in that moment, know what a foot, or for that matter what anything, was. All was a mystery.

Yet the sight of the insect, the foot, the leg, and the room filled her with delight and awe. She was a newborn, gazing in wonder at life. “It was the most amazing thing,” she recalled. “I looked at the foot and the leg and I had never seen anything so beautiful and marvelous. It was the same with the floor, with the cockroach, and with the light, seeing it for the first time…and the unfolding of it was so incredible…total, total joy.”

The world was new. Katie had awakened from “an ancient dream.” Whatever had previously obscured her view of life’s in-herent perfection was gone. Now, from moment to moment, she saw and joyously embraced reality exactly as it was. Everything she gazed upon, within and without, glowed with radiant life.

We may never know what catalyzed this simple yet absolute turnaround in perception and consciousness. But one thing was certain: Overnight, Katie had moved from suicidal despair to ecstatic freedom. The madwoman had vanished. In her place ap-peared a beautiful changeling, an innocent child.

No one, least of all Katie, understood what had happened. Her daughter Roxann at first believed that her mother was playing a trick. Yet she saw a different person come home. “Her face was changed completely,” Roxann reported. “Her eyes were cleared. She was not the same person.”

Understandably, Roxann feared the return of the madwoman she had known. But what had happened to Katie persisted and only deepened over time. Her past behind her, her future yet to unfold, she now lived in the eternal present. Her contact with everyday reality — with people, objects, and situations — though at times bewildering, continued to fill her with joy.

For a time, Roxann led her mother, still absorbed in a childlike state of awe, around by the hand. Katie would spontaneously hug people on the street — friends, strangers, the homeless — with equal delight. Surprisingly, many let her, perhaps sensing her unconditional love and acceptance.

For seven years after the awakening, inner revelations came to Katie, and she tried to put them into words to share with others: “…there is only love…there is no time…unlearning is everything….” But she had leaped across a chasm of consciousness, and no words seemed capable of building a bridge for those who couldn’t see to the other side. She said of that time: “I was wild with love, mad with love.” But words couldn’t convey it. She had to live her realization to sustain it.

Katie stopped trying to tell people what they hadn’t asked to hear and began to simply love — to love those she had known, those she had harmed, and those she now met — no longer expecting them to understand, to be good, to love her back, or to be anything other than who they were.

Living the truth had nothing to do with changing other people. Who they were, and what they did, was their business. Her only business was to love them unconditionally. By living in this way, Katie gradually regained the trust of the family she had nearly destroyed, and helped to heal them.

One night six months after her awakening, Katie experienced a kind of spiritual agony from the tension of trying to live and love in a world that did not yet understand or accept who she was. An old woman appeared to her, sitting in a chair beside the bed, “a wonderful, voluptuous old lady with her hair tied in a bun.” Katie merged into this lady, and found herself looking out through ancient eyes. In this altered state, she saw herself and Paul, lying on the bed, as two primal beings who didn’t yet realize that they didn’t have to suffer. Life itself was unfolding perfectly.

For the next seven years, the marvelous old woman appeared to guide Katie: What I’ve come to know is that I projected the lady…like a movie…as a result of painful limitations I was experiencing in this dimension. We give ourselves exactly what we need. We supply our own medicine….Today I don’t wait for angels. I am always the angel I have been awaiting, and so are you.

It’s not out there, it’s in here….Some people would project Christ, others Krishna….I projected a fat lady with a bun on her head wearing a paisley dress — that’s who I could trust. Now I trust All. I woke up knowing that God is everything….There is no exception in my experience.

Katie’s thoughts returned, of course, as thoughts do — and with them judgments, fears, and expectations. At such times she felt herself slipping from the freedom of her awakening into the mind of suffering. But whenever this happened, she worked her way back by a compassionate vigilance, inspecting the thoughts, beliefs, and false assumptions that separated her from others and set her against life. Doing this “Work,” as she called it, returned her gracefully to the pristine awareness of her original awakening.

The Work became her constant practice. Through this process, and her unconditional acceptance of life, Katie made peace with each moment — and with every event past or present. “All that I went through — every breath,” she said, “was what it took for me to finally wake up. All teaches love in the long run. All needs are supplied….Every experience of life is for this.”

Byron Katie went on to travel worldwide teaching the Work — the fruit of her past struggles, her extraordinary awakening, and her continual surrender to life as it arises, moment to moment.

Bios for Dan Millman and Doug Childers:
Dan Millman is a former world trampoline champion, hall of fame gymnast, university coach, college professor, and bestselling author whose eight books, including Way of the Peaceful Warrior, The Laws of Spirit, and The Life You Were Born to Live, have inspired millions of people in more than twenty languages. His books and seminars have influenced people from all walks of life, including leaders in the fields of health, business, education, entertainment, and sports. A youthful grandfather, he lives with his family in northern California.

Doug Childers is an author, editor, and writing coach whose books include The Energy Prescription and The White-Haired Girl. He lives with his family in northern California.

From the book Bridge Between Worlds. Copyright © 1999, 2009 by Dan Millman and Doug Childers. Reprinted with permission from New World Library. www.NewWorldLibrary.com

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The Principles of Successful Manifesting - How to make your life dreams come true.
Click here to download

2. Recognize that ALL change (good or bad) means loss
The ‘evil’ we know is sometimes less scary than the ‘evil’ we don’t know. It is normal to be afraid to make a change because of what you stand to lose. However, the only way is forward, so you might as well accept whatever perceived loss of status, money or identity and realize that more happiness awaits. In fact, if everyone else is telling you you are crazy for making a change, you are on the right track!

3. Reframe ‘I can’t!’ to ‘I can!’
“I’m not good enough.” “I’m too old.” “I’m not qualified.” NOT TRUE! Look for examples in your life, your surroundings, in the media or in books of people who have done things against the odds and use those examples as symbols of what’s possible for you. Change your vocabulary and watch your results change.

4. Understand how the past got you stuck today
Many of us make vows when we are young that get us stuck as adults. “I’ll never be like my parents!” “I won’t be poor!” “I’ll show them!” Whatever it is, the motivation you chose at some early point worked but is no longer working now. Determine what your old motivation for your life was, decide if it still serves you and if not, CHANGE it. Fast!

5. Realize that discovering your ‘purpose’ does not have to be hard or grand
Many people, when searching for direction in their life may also be putting their life’s purpose into question. Most make the mistake of thinking they have to have a Mother Teresa-level of purpose to rate. It’s just not true and that likely keeps you stuck or suffering.

Who you are everyday and what you do naturally (whether it fits your job description or not) is your purpose. How you affect others positively is your purpose. What you contribute that is uniquely you is your purpose. It’s right under your nose. Recognize it and try to make it central to whatever you do next.

6. Gain a criteria for happiness
Most people know they are not satisfied but really lack clear criteria for what will make them happy. Humans feel satisfied when their needs are met and they don’t have to compromise their values. Write down what you truly need (emotionally, not financially) and value.

Do you need stability? Honesty? Recognition? Do you value spirituality? Adventure? Education? These are not optional. Get purposeful about getting these things in your life and new directions become clear.

7. Research ALL that interests you
List all fields, jobs, careers, or areas of interest. Choose no more than three at a time to research. Besides the internet, try to talk to people who will let you have an informational interview or give you the real scoop on the areas you are interested in. A process of elimination will begin and one particular area may get traction through luck and coincidence that starts to feel like the front-runner.

8. Tell the truth about your money life
Money is usually the first thing that stops people from pursuing what they truly want. Don’t let it stop you. Get straight with your money. Even if it’s painful to see, know what you have and don’t. Don’t let it stop you. Moonlight, borrow or barter to move toward your new direction.

9. Put Yourself in Opportunity’s Way
It’s time to push the envelope. Take risks, get out of your comfort zone and get out there. See opportunity where it is – everywhere – and don’t be shy about asking for favors or things that seem pushy. There are great rewards out there when you put yourself on the line.

10.Create a Plan and Get Support
Make a timeline for how you are going to cross over into something new. It usually takes 1-3 years to fully transition into a new direction. Don’t fret. Make a monthly plan and get plenty of cheerleaders around you. No naysayers! Hire a coach or get a group of like minded folks around you and you will be settled in a new, satisfying direction before you know it.

And note: Unbearable situations seem more bearable when you know you are on your way out. Hang in there!

©2009 Laura Berman Fortgang, author of Now What?: 90 Days to a New Life Direction

About the Author
Laura Berman Fortgang, author of Now What?: 90 Days to a New Life Direction, is a pioneer in the life-coaching profession. A renowned speaker and the president and owner of InterCoach, Inc., a full-service life-coaching business that works with individuals, small businesses, and corporations, she is also the author of The Little Book on Meaning, Living Your Best Life and Take Yourself to the Top. She lives in Montclair, New Jersey.
For more information please visit: www.nowwhatcoaching.com

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Florian, who has listened to our conversation, runs to his room, crying loudly, “Why don’t we go?” He has never been more upset. Somehow Florian’s huge disappointment does the trick. It moves Syb’s Soul to courageously stand up and speak. He reaches within himself and says the magic words, “OKAY, why not now! Why wait?”

That night, the lawyer calls back one minute before 12 PM. For the first time, we are seriously speaking about the terms. The speed is fast. It is as if the Universe wants to hurry up and finalize the deal, fearing we may back off. The lawyer explains that the owner is considering our bid; however, we need to increase our offer.

Syb and I discuss the price and, after some intuitive play with numbers, we finalize our bid. Fifteen minutes later, we make a call to America and give our final price. The lawyer says he will call us back sometime on the weekend. So, until that time, we keep our fingers crossed.We don’t have long to wait; as always, the timing is divine.

On Sunday afternoon when Syb is away at the hockey field and I am alone in the house with the younger kids, the lawyer calls. He asks for the man of the house; since he is not home, I am allowed to take the call.

The question is, are we okay with the final price the owner is offering? In one blush, I say, “YES.” I don’t need time to think. He asks if I have any conditions or if my answer is a full YES. He tells me my answer is considered a legal bid; we can’t back off.

Was it my innocence or was it my stupidity or maybe my Soul was very wise? I say we are okay with the price, no conditions. I say, “Let’s do it,” as if buying a loaf of bread. Oh, my God, I think to myself. I just bought a house over the phone. The receiver trembles in my hand. I can’t wait to tell Syb but I have to still my impatience until he comes back from the hockey field.

A bottle of champagne is hidden behind my back and, when he opens the front door, I say, “I have good news . . . we bought The House.” He lifts me up and swirls me through the living room until he asks, “You did say under condition of us getting our visas, right?” He puts me down and I look at him in shock. “Did I have to mention that?” “I thought he would never sell to us with a condition like that. It’s such a big risk for him; that can take six months.Who would go for that?” is my answer.

The truth is I totally forgot; it never even crossed my mind and, perhaps, for a very good reason. Soul sedated my brain for the sake of the outcome. (We did hear later that Michael never would have sold the house to us with visa conditions.) Silently, I thanked God that Syb was away and I was the one to answer the phone. Syb looks at me in disbelief but sees the truth.

This whole situation is outside the threaded path. We have to pay the full amount on January 1st. The biggest question is: How are we going to pay the full amount before we have sold our house? We need to solve this question within six weeks and there is no extra money in the bank.

That night, we sit down in front of our fireplace and rejoice. It is hard to grasp that we DID IT.We are the proud owners of 102 OCEAN PINES AVENUE, ROCKPORT, MA USA. In the morning, I call a good friend and tell her we have bought a house in the States. She asks if we know what we have done and I honestly answer that we don’t. This move is beyond explanation. It is a move of the Soul.

We pedal fast: we have to find a way to come up with the full amount to buy our new house in Rockport by Jan 1. Our Dutch house cannot be sold until spring; our savings account is empty. “I know there are enough wealthy people in this world who could lend us the amount we need,” I declare, passionately. The power with which I speak is felt in my spine; I shiver and believe my own words down to my core.

Eight hours later the exact amount of money is manifested. A friend calls early in the morning to ask us over for a drink. I tell him we have bought a house the night before. He is so very impressed and inspired by our story that he offers to lend us the amount we need. I look into the receiver to show him my smile. Without my asking or implying our need, the Universe has responded to our call. The money will be paid in full in January.

What was next? Weeks later we choose the bank for support instead of our friend as the lender. We want to protect our friendship and, amazingly, the bank transfers the full amount of money one minute before the closing time on the agreement. Our nerves are tested a bit.

My TRUST was anchored forever in a deep belief the Universe will support us when we live from the heart. Life becomes abundantly more satisfying when passion is our fuel. I had come to truly feel there was no other way; no matter how unpaved the road ahead of us, we have to listen to our inner voice. When we do, Soul will guide us with great wisdom ALWAYS.

Excerpt from: A Suitcase Full of Faith – How one woman found her dream weaving the divine thread of her soul.

For more information please visit: Suitcase Full of Faith

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For over 20 years I carried a grudge, an anger closer to hatred of my own mother. I felt totally justified and was utterly convinced I had the right to express openly this anger against what I believed was my mother’s absence and lack of caring, love or any motherly feelings toward me since the death of my father. In fact I drew my strength from these things to carry on with my life.

Only a few close friends knew about it and even when I started doing my relaxation studies I never thought this issue had anything to do with my search for mental harmony and the frustration of not being able to reach it completely.

My incessant moving around this planet from one country to another brought me personal and material satisfaction but left me with an empty feeling. Like a potted tree that hasn’t yet found mother earth’s ground in which to thrive.

When I decided to come back to Canada five years ago, little did I know that it would be the beginning of a journey which would take me back in time and reunite me with my mother.

My sister had arranged for us to meet and although I wasn’t too keen to do so, I accepted. I was tense, arrogant and disagreeable when we met. As my mother tried to kiss me I pulled back and simply offered my hand for a handshake.

Her first words stayed engraved in my mind and heart for the days to come when she said, “All that I want is to ask if you could forgive me for not being the mother I wish I could have been, my son, I am so sorry…”
We met again a few days later and we talked openly about our pains, hurts, sorrows and expectations. It was the first time I saw my mother as a woman and as a human being; not from a child’s point of view.

My father’s untimely passing away at thirty two left a beautiful young widow of twenty six years old with four children, the youngest 25 days old to take care of, a few cattle ranches and a retail business in a male- oriented society. Having only an aging father and a younger sister in Brazil, she was alone and against all odds, she succeeded in raising her family.

Compassion and understanding gave me the strength not only to forgive her, but to forgive myself for the senseless pain I inflicted myself and the guilt it carries with it.

We became very close again, and slowly the whole family seemed to come closer and closer. I soon found out that forgiveness is a positive energy that spreads much quicker than I thought. I have nephews, nieces, and cousins that are now an integral positive part of my life. A new route was opening on my path and the writing of Dream Your Life Positively came a year  after.

A well documented site on this subject is “A Campaign for Forgiveness Research”* where I found some important examples cited here.

Each time we witness an act of forgiveness, we marvel at its power to heal, to break a seemingly unending cycle of pain. Forgiveness is something virtually all Americans aspire to. In a Gallup poll nationwide survey, 94% said it was important to forgive, but it is not something we frequently offer. (In the same survey, only 48% said they usually tried to forgive others.) Perhaps this is because forgiveness is something we don’t fully understand, or we associate forgiveness with weakness as Friedrich Nietzsche did.

Some view forgiveness as an almost saintly quality that blesses only the very special and most certainly cannot be learned.  In fact, the opposite is true, forgiveness is a sign of strength.

Research conducted at the University of Wisconsin in 1997 indicates forgiveness can be taught, with positive results.

I told a friend of mine that if she wanted to find a healthier source of strength after her separation from an abusive husband, she must forgive him before she could find her own way to happiness.

“After what I have been through with that bastard? When hell freezes over…” was her answer.
I suggested she try the three affirmations below for a few weeks and see if she still felt the same way.

• I am good, compassionate and I now have the strength to forgive.
• I deserve to be happy and successful.
• I am now ready to receive more love, support and wealth from the vast supply of the universe.

After two weeks of affirmations she told me that the most difficult thing was to think of him and all the bad incidents. The pain, despair  and guilt would come back but she now understood that she wanted to be able to forgive and in her prayers she asked God to help her to forgive.
I knew then she had found her path.

Forgiving is not condoning; hurtful actions have consequences. Yet couples who communicate forgiveness may hold the key to stable marriages. What makes some marriages last a lifetime, while others falter and fall apart?

According to Professor Douglas Kelley of Arizona State University West, the key to long-term conjugal bliss may be in how well a couple communicates forgiveness. “These days the notion of equality, an eye for an eye, is prominent,” says Kelley. “That makes forgiveness counter-intuitive – but at the same time, a lot of people who don’t call themselves religious or spiritual are forgiving one another. Is it because they sense that they will reap the benefits of forgiving for years to come, or is there some other motive?”

In the end, Kelley hopes that embracing and communicating forgiveness can provide a sense of well-being and stability for couples living in an increasingly stressed society.

Forgiving doesn’t change what has passed, neither does it justify or make it all right. It allows you to focus on your life from a pain free emotional state. The past no longer makes you cringe, cry or swear.

Forgiveness simply helps you to let go of that negative baggage and makes a place for all the positive things you wish to have.

I know a lot of people who after a lover’s break up or a friend’s betrayal have vowed “I will never let  anyone hurt me like that again.” It is quite justifiable, it is your survival instinct, a protective shield taking over, but be careful that this shield will also prevent you from connecting with new people and eventually making new friends. This is  negative living, and most people are not even aware of it.

Forgiveness is letting go of that negative emotional baggage and  starting on a new path stronger than before. It is very difficult, I know, to accept the fact that someone you loved and trusted, who has betrayed and stabbed you in the back, deserves your forgiveness.

When I lost a best friend of 25 years to what I thought was petty gossip, I was devastated and questioned the sincerity of her friendship all those years.

After forgiving her I can now look back and laugh at the good moments we had together. Sincerity is no longer a question, my love for her is the same, but I no longer need to see, speak or interact with her. Our roads just took a different direction, that was all.

Make an assessment of the people in your life, and the ones who are gone. What are your feelings about them? Is there someone you feel “I dislike (or hate) that SOB” either for personal reasons or because of malicious gossip? Or is there someone you distanced from and in your book is unforgivable? You are carrying some heavy negative emotional baggage. Get rid of it AS SOON AS POSSIBLE if you want the good energy of positive living to reach you.

An important, well documented and proven factor is that your anger, hurt and pain not only will affect the way you communicate with others, but eventually will exclude you from social contact. Your self worth is constantly being questioned and if you don’t take action it will eventually break down.

“Forgiveness allows one to overcome a situation that would otherwise be a major source of stress, both mentally and neurobiological. Forgiveness is thought to dramatically change the individual’s biological homeostatic equilibrium. He will assess the neurobiological response associated with forgiveness and unforgiving-ness.” Study of the Brain Functional Correlates of Forgiveness in Humans -Pietro Pietrini, M.D., Ph.D.,  Pisa – Italy.

Forgiveness benefits both, but you the most, because you left the negative baggage behind. You are now ready to receive the positive force, energy, love, wealth and success the universe has in store for you.
The other person doesn’t even need to know, it is irrelevant. Neither do you have to bring that person into your life or closer circle any more. What matters is your thoughts and therefore your actions. If it is clean, clear and positive, so will your life, your friends and your future be.

“Forgiveness is both a decision and a real change in emotional experience. That change in emotion is related to better mental and physical health.”

Everett L. Worthington, Jr., Ph.D.  Executive Director, A Campaign For Forgiveness Research.
From a decade-old grudge against the third-grade bully to deep-seated rage against a cheating spouse, millions of Americans harbor long-term grievances. Dr. Carl Thoresen, a professor at Stanford University, and his colleague, Dr. Fred Luskin, are exploring whether the unresolved anger that blights many people’s lives can be alleviated with the help of an age-old concept: forgiveness.

Together, the pair launched a comprehensive research project: The Stanford Forgiveness Study. Thoresen and Luskin hope the impact of their work will be preventative as well as therapeutic.

“It’s our hope that family and school violence, including shootings, road rage, gang violence and workplace conflict will be diminished – if not avoided – if more people understand the role that forgiveness can play in interpersonal relations.” says Thoresen.

It takes courage and commitment to act in a more forgiving fashion. It’s not at all a sign of weakness but a mark of strength.

About the author:
Ton Pascal is a self thought , self help advocate and author. He believes that the times we are facing in our world require a more spiritual approach to our everyday lives. Forgiveness benefits both, but you the most, because you left the negative baggage behind. You are now ready to receive the positive force, energy, love, wealth and success the universe have in store for you.
Visit his website and his book Dream Your Life Positively.

Get your free copy of my new book:
The Principles of Successful Manifesting - How to make your life dreams come true.
Click here to download

Prescription #12:  Black Holes of Renewal
When we need to find our energy and source, the place to look is in the darkness. It is in the black holes that the energy of creation lives. Whether we are speaking of the universe or of an individual, darkness is the source of life.

When facing emotional despair, hopelessness, or physical anguish, going into the darkness helps us to find our self and renew our life. It is in the nothingness that we can stop and find peace and answers. When we see our true potential, we can then create ourselves anew. We can become like a blank canvas and begin the act of creation out of the darkness.

When I lecture, I hold up a piece of paper with a black dot on it and then ask people to describe what they see. Many say a black dot, while others answer correctly and say a piece of paper with a dot on it. You can decide to focus on the darkness or use it to appreciate that your life contains light too. You would never appreciate the light if you didn’t have the darkness.

Don’t be afraid of the darkness. Let the Director show you the way! Go inside, discover your own black hole, and emerge with new energy and the true light of awareness. Let the tomb become a womb.

Prescription #23:  Have No Regrets
You don’t want to live in such a way that when your life is over you are left thinking more about what you didn’t do than what you did do. Think about how you would feel on your deathbed if you were wishing you had done that one special thing or taken that chance that you let pass by.

From that perspective, examine your life today. Think about some risks you have been unwilling to take – perhaps changing careers, following a dream, opening your heart to another person, or being all you can be. You can do nothing to change the decisions you made in your past, but the future holds many opportunities.

I remember a college football player diagnosed with cancer who said to me, “Before I got cancer there were games where I could have given more of myself.” He regretted that he had held back. From his battle with cancer, he learned to not leave anything in the locker room but to bring it all with him out on the field. We all need to “bring it all out on the field” of our lives. It is the only way not to have regrets. Let there be no “if only’s” or “I wish I had’s” in your life.

Prescription #35: A Best Friend
Who is the most important person in your life? Reflect on that question for a moment. The answer is you. No one can replace you. You need to be for yourself what we all need: a best friend, someone who can put up with your craziness and inadequacies but still accept you and be there for you.

Stop tearing yourself to pieces when others don’t like something you’ve done. Even if what you did was wrong, dangerous, or stupid, it is the act, not you, that is the problem.

So do not let others destroy the relationship you have with the most important person in your life—you! Accept your uniqueness and free others to be themselves too.

Prescription #115:  Fail Successfully
You can see failure as a reason to stop what you are doing, or you can ask yourself why you failed and then learn from your mistakes. Mistakes can be a valuable part of life’s curriculum.

You would do well to fail frequently so you can learn a great deal more than someone who is afraid to fail and therefore takes little risk. If you have passion for what you are doing and aim high, good things will happen even if it takes a lot of failing to accomplish them.

Accidents, failures, and mistakes can often lead us to our greatest successes and open us to our true interests. For instance, say you have a project you want to complete but you need more knowledge of the subject. So you take an evening course at a local college. You walk into the wrong class and become so interested in the subject that it changes your life.

About the author:
Dr. Bernie Siegel’s multi-million best-selling first book, Love, Medicine & Miracles, was published in 1986. He is the author of many other books including 101 Excercises for the Soul, Peace, Love & Healing.

Excerpted with permission from 365 Prescriptions for the Soul: Daily Words for Healing Body, Mind & Spirit © 2009 Dr. Bernie Siegel. Printed with permission of New World Library, Novato, CA. www.newworldlibrary.com

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The Principles of Successful Manifesting - How to make your life dreams come true.
Click here to download

Nearly five years ago, author and entrepreneur Gay Hendricks had an idea to create a DVD club that would provide films about love, compassion and inspiration.

His idea soon grew into Spiritual Cinema Circle, a subscription-based DVD club which finds movies at film festivals around the world and delivers them to members each month on a DVD that they get to keep.

So, what exactly is spiritual cinema?
Box office hits such as FIELD OF DREAMS, GHOST, WHALE RIDER and WHAT THE #$*! DO WE KNOW are all well-known examples. According to Hendricks, “Spiritual Cinema is the kind of entertainment we really need these days: movies that make you feel at better about being human.”

One perfect little gem of spiritual cinema is the short film VALIDATION, which is available free at WatchValidation.com. As a way of saying thank you this holiday season, Spiritual Cinema Circle (SCC) is providing a free on-line viewing of this heartwarming film (16 minutes) which exemplifies the uplifting movies SCC offers its subscribers.

This enchanting film tells the story of a parking attendant who gives his customers REAL validation by dispensing both free parking and free compliments.  It’s a great reminder of how we can all create a better world, instantly, by sharing a smile and a few kind words.  Please visit Spiritual Cinema Circle and watch this film, share it with your friends too. It will bring a smile to your face and maybe even some joyous tears!

I recently caught up with writer/director of VALIDATION Kurt Kuenne to find out more about his film. Kuenne is an award-winning filmmaker and composer of both fiction and documentary films. Upon the release of his first feature in 1999, he was named one of the Top 25 New Faces of Indie Film by Filmmaker Magazine.

His work as a writer/director/composer includes the teen drama “Scrapbook” (1999) starring Eric Balfour, the PBS documentary “Drive-In Movie Memories” (2001) with Leonard Maltin, and a series of popular short film musical comedies – “Rent-A-Person” (2004), “Slow” (2007) and “The Phone Book” (2008) – the last two of which are currently playing festivals around the world.  His award-winning documentary “Dear Zachary: a letter to a son about his father” premiered at the 2008 Slamdance Film Festival and opens theatrically nationwide this year.

Arielle:  Where did the story for VALIDATION come from?
Kurt:  One day, I was at the mall and forgot to get my parking validated. As I was walking back to the validation booth, it occurred to me how nice it would be if, when I asked for validation, they gave me “real” validation.  And then I realized, “That’s my good friend, the brilliant actor, TJ Thyne (“Bones”). That’s what he does!”  I knew immediately that TJ would play a parking attendant who dispensed both free parking and free compliments.  The story grew from there.

Arielle:  How did making this film change you?
Kurt: We filled out the cast with dozens of actors from TJ’s theatre troupe, Theatre Junkies. We had a wonderful time making the film and I now have a wealth of new friends in my life. Showing the film at festivals has been very rewarding. Kiwanis has begun using the film in its leadership training programs, certain ministers use it with their congregations, and some organizations tell me that they show it to their employees to boost morale.  I never would have anticipated that reaction, and it’s wonderful to know that people are finding something in the film that perhaps I wasn’t aware was there.

Arielle:  What are your favorite films with transformational themes?
IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE (whose title is on the movie theatre marquee in VALIDATION by no accident), E.T., BACK TO THE FUTURE, FORREST GUMP, and THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION.

Arielle: What’s next for you?
Kurt: My documentary, DEAR ZACHARY: A LETTER TO A SON ABOUT HIS FATHER  just opened theatrically in New York and began rolling out nationally. (Cities and theatre info can be found at www.dearzachary.com) The next film I’m shooting is called MASON MULE. It’s a screenplay for which I won a Nicholl Fellowship in Screenwriting from the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences a few years back.  I’ve been trying to get it going for many years and it looks like I’ll finally be directing it late spring of next year, fingers crossed.

About Spiritual Cinema Circle
Spiritual Cinema Circle, a Gaiam company (www.gaiam.com), is a leader in subscription based spiritual home entertainment.   Spiritual Cinema Circle is a film community co-hosted by Stephen Simon and Mariel Hemingway that offers uplifting and spiritually-themed short and full-length films and insightful discussions on their meanings and lessons. For more information, please visit spiritualcinemacircle.com

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The Principles of Successful Manifesting - How to make your life dreams come true.
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