Life is an amazing journey. Once it starts, we are in for countless experiences which will forever affect us one way or another. How we choose to think will always be the single most important factor in determining the quality of our lives. It is crucial to realize and acknowledge that our experiences are simply just that, our experiences.

Simply put, there are certain aspects of life which absolutely must be under our control in order to live life to the fullest.

We are all unique in every sense of the word. We are unique in our looks, our likes and dislikes, and definitely in our ways of thinking and behavior. It is this very difference in our personal characteristics which can make interaction with others both so much fun - and quite challenging at the same time.

As a person chooses to take more time towards better understanding themselves as to why they think the way they think, feel the way they feel, and do what they do, something quite amazing happens… One finds that just as this information is applicable to better understanding oneself; it can also be effectively used to better understand others.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.”
- Aristotle

Humans are certainly creatures of habit. We go about living our lives one day at a time, often performing same tasks over and over again daily, weekly, monthly, and so on.

A habit can be simply defined as any task we consciously or unconsciously perform on a regular basis. A habit can be as basic as always putting on a seat belt prior to starting our vehicles or more sophisticated such as taking an hour just for ourselves every Sunday evening to reflect back on the prior week and plan the one coming ahead.

“There is only one boss. The customer. And he can fire everybody in the company from the chairman on down, simply by spending his money somewhere else.”

Sam Walton, Founder of Wal-Mart

Sam Walton lived a life which displayed everything he believed in. Over the years, especially since Wal-Mart became a publicly traded company on the stock market, Sam’s vision and philosophy have slowly been forgotten. Although Wal-Mart may not offer the greatest customer service today, Sam’s words on the importance of customers to any business are timeless.

Let’s admit it; we all want to be more, do more, and have more. When you ask people if they would like to be happier, healthier, or more prosperous financially, you are certain to get an affirmative response. This is because every living thing in nature is programmed with a desire to improve. We are most certainly a part of nature. Since the beginning of time, our deep instinct of wanting to be more, do more, and have more has been one of the primary reasons behind general advancement of the human race.

You often see articles on ways to unwind and relax after a stressful day, which I always find useful, but for me the most important advice would be to get to the source of the problem, and cut stress out before it even happens. By careful editing of your life, and changing certain habits, you can eliminate most (not all) sources of stress in your life.

But back to the idea of the duality of polar opposites. This tension between polar opposites described by the mystics, interestingly enough, is reflected in the human brain - or, you might say that because the brain/mind creates these divisions, it isn’t a surprise that the brain is structured in a split manner.

I’ve often spoken about three goals I believe pretty much all people have: to be happy, to be peaceful inside, and to be successful in the world. If I were to pick one term to encapsulate what I mean by all three of these, it would be that all humans wish to thrive. This series of articles, in large part, is about how to thrive. But instead of looking at the fine details, as we have when looking at your Internal Map of Reality, we’re going to look more at general principles. If you follow these principles, you’ll have the ingredients that will allow you to thrive in this life.

In today’s hectic world we often do not take the time to allow ourselves the luxury of quality time with ourselves, free from the cares and craziness of the daily circus that is our lives. It seems that, on the whole, we’ve all become phenomenal multitaskers, capable of amazing feats of juggling and endless readjustments to our schedules.

An important aspect of being a creator of your reality is to be in control of your reality at all times. When you are not being in control of your reality, other forces are pulling you in all directions, causing you to feel out of control, lost and confused about what is going on. You stay in control by knowing what it is that you want and acting accordingly, and not to the wishes and influences of the people and environment around you. Being in control also makes you attractive to others because you’re powerful.

Each of us has unique talents and capabilities and an important work to do in life. The tragedy is that our unique contribution is often never made because the important “first things” in our lives are choked out by other urgent things. And so some important works are never started or finished. We suggest that the path to personal leadership follows the stepping stones of vision, mission, balance, roles, goals, perspective, and integrity in the moment of choice. It’s an ecological balancing process. We invite readers to think very carefully through this process. “What my responsibilities in life? Who are the people I care about?” The answers become the basis for thinking through your roles.

Make it Nonnegotiable
Promise yourself that you are absolutely going to do it. When you do it, where you do it, how you do it can, and most likely will, change according to circumstances. But that you will do it is not open for consideration. Call it a vow, a promise, a pledge, a commitment. Whatever you name it, making it choiceless is a tool for overcoming backsliding after your initial enthusiasm fades. You don�t negotiate with yourself about brushing your teeth. You just do it. I bet you usually honor your commitments to other people too. Treat yourself equally well. Make your resolution a nonnegotiable commitment in your life.