How to Brake the Cycle of Blame and Pain

Monday, July 6th, 2009

It’s been called the “Blame Game”. It’s a favorite pass time of politicians everywhere. You know it is coming when a public official (or anyone else, for that matter) starts a faux apology with “I’m sorry if you…” The subtle shifting of the blame from to the recipient of the apology has been elevated to an art form in some political circles. In the real world, however, blame and forgiveness cannot walk hand in hand.

We’ve all heard the expression “I can forgive, but I won’t forget“. What that really translates to is “I’m forgiving you for now, but I reserve the right to un-forgive at some point in the future.” Forgiving without forgetting is not truly forgiving. You cannot sincerely and completely forgive someone if you continue to blame the person for the offense.

Timeshifting – How to Control The Speed of Time

Thursday, December 18th, 2008

Dr. Rechtschaffen’s book Timeshifting grew out of the workshops he leads on the creative use of time. Unlike time-management courses which teach people how to work efficiently at an ever-accelerating pace, Rechtschaffen’s basic premise is that it is crucial to learn how to “timeshift,” to move smoothly from fast to medium to slow and back again. Each speed has its proper place, he believes, but the rhythms of industrialized societies, including the United States, encourage us to live in “fast forward” virtually all the time. He asserts that we pay a heavy price for doing so.