The Paradox of Being in Control without Controlling

By Enoch Tan in Management on October 23rd, 2007 / One Comment

An important aspect of being a creator of your reality is to be in control of your reality at all times. When you are not being in control of your reality, other forces are pulling you in all directions, causing you to feel out of control, lost and confused about what is going on. You stay in control by knowing what it is that you want and acting accordingly, and not to the wishes and influences of the people and environment around you. Being in control also makes you attractive to others because you’re powerful.

It is a very different situation when you are in a group as compared to when you are alone. When you are in a group, the many different intentions and thoughts of people are pulling you in many different directions all at the same time. Therefore to be in control, you have to stay centered and act according to your own mind. You do not have to follow along with the activities of the group no matter who is leading if it is not your wish. You are not here to please men but to please God which is your true inner self.

Have the boldness to declare your own intentions and do what you want without asking for permission because it is your reality and you do not need anyone’s permission in it. Show strength of perception by stating your own opinion when it differs from others. Be in charge by talking about how you want things to be in your space. Show that you are a whole person and treat others with wholeness by not being approval seeking or giving. All these communicates higher status about you being a creator of your reality.

There are times when you may be in a very positive state of consciousness because you’re feeling really good about what has happened or is going to happen. But then you meet someone who is in a really negative state of consciousness. Your interaction with that person threatens to pull you down to a lower state and they refuse to be lifted to a higher state by your positivity. You do not have to lower your state just because of their reality, but you can continue to remain positive and let them be negative.

Sometimes people have a way of seeing things which are different from the way you see it. But if you are not careful, you could be unknowingly influenced into seeing it the way they see it even though it is not good for you. Do not buy into other people’s frame of reality, but make them buy into yours. After all perception frames reality, therefore if your frame is the better one for all
then you should have the boldness to enforce it over others. That is the characteristic of good leadership, so be the leader always.

In your reality, you are the creator and everyone else is an aspect of your consciousness. You make the choices and not let others make the choices for you. You can always have a choice by choosing to have a choice. You do it by not letting others tell you that you can’t do this, or have this or that you don’t have a choice. Be assertive about what you want and not being apologetic about it. Be the selector by showing that you’re the one who does the choosing. Others don’t choose you, you choose them.

Every request, suggestion or directions from others that are not in line with your intentions and desires are tests for your strength of consciousness, power of will and quality of perception. Strength of consciousness is what dominance is all about. Do not let others tell you what to do but do only what you want. Tell others what to do because it is your reality and everyone is an element for you to move. Be a commander of man and a master of people. Be a king in your kingdom and a ruler of your world.

Do not be caught up in following the current trends and affairs of people just because you want to fit in when it isn’t really the style or way of living that you prefer. Show that you are aware but above it. You do not participate in such things because it is not what you want to create in your reality. Be transcendent. Live in your own reality and not in the reality of others. You do
not have to abide by consensus reality but you can choose your own. Be different, be independent. Be unique, be individual. Be you.

It is also important to act as a master of your reality, a creator and a ruler of your world. Have strong gestures and postures, not weak gestures and postures. Have strong eye contact to show strength of will. Speak with a voice of authority and certainty. Show by your mannerisms that you know what you’re doing, where you are going and what’s good for you as well as for others.
Demonstrate a strong reality, strong identity and strong intent to others in everything you do. Be calm and composed at all times.

Be in control by not needing to control everything. This is a paradox here but when you are trying to control something that isn’t letting you control it, you are being controlled by it if you allow yourself to be attached and lose your power. Command and demand but do not lose composure or presence when you are not obeyed. Be insistent but detached. When you can pull the strings of others without letting your own strings get tangled in theirs, that is when you
have freedom of control over reality.

Be a god of your reality, because it is your reality and no one else’s. Don’t give any of your power away. Keep all your power for yourself by only allowing yourself to have the final say of things. You don’t have to control other people but you only need to control yourself and not let others control you. Perfect reality creation is a balance and combination of letting go and allowing situations to guide you along, and also by taking control of where and how you want things to go. Perfect control is what feels right.

About the author:
Enoch Tan aims to help people achieve greater awareness in living and experiencing life. To evolve human consciousness to higher levels. To change lives and transform the universe. To revolutionize the way we understand the mind and reality. Because that is what governs every area of life and destiny.

Get Free Ebooks of The Most Powerful Knowledge and Learn Secrets of Mind and Reality That will Fully Benefit You Now at: Secrets of Mind and Reality

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One Response to “The Paradox of Being in Control without Controlling”

  1. frank Says:

    i would say that u have narrowed everything into one simple fact ‘be in your own reality’ big time.

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